By Judy Villanueva

Then Elijah stood in front of them and said, “How much longer will you waver, hobbling between two opinions? If the Lord is God, follow him! But if Baal is God, then follow him!” (1Kings 18:21)

OUCH, this hit me right between the eyes!  I am reading a book on the beatitudes and right in the middle of the chapter called “Happy Are The Pure In Heart,” this verse jumped off the page and threw water in my face!  “What?  ME?  Hobbling between two opinions?” But in my heart of hearts, I knew it was true and as I toweled off my face, I reread the words and let them sink in more deeply.  The words felt like a strong correction and at the same time, like the most loving words I’ve ever read.  I think that’s how it often feels when God speaks.  He always tells the truth but with so much love that my heart melts, my knees buckle, and my hands open to receive whatever gift He offers me, even if it’s a correction.  The morning reading became a confrontation and an invitation to stop wavering and decidedly place my life in God’s care.

What are my “two opinions?”  Where am I double-minded?  I confess that I waffle back and forth between trusting God with all my heart and wondering if He heard the prayer I just prayed.  There are days when my feet must dance because the goodness of God has touched me and there are days when I can’t discern the reality of His presence.  So, I hobble along.  Do you hobble, too?  There are many ways to waver between “two opinions.”   It might be living one way on the outside and another on the inside or agreeing with the Word spoken on Sunday morning but determining your own way when you walk out the door.  It may even result from living a life so distracted by many things that there is little room left for the One Thing —WHO is everything.  

“Hear, O Israel! The Lord is our God, the Lord is one!  You shall love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your might.” (Deut. 6:4-5)

Living between two opinions dims our light and dilutes our saltiness, not to mention the fact that it weakens our ability to trust and obey God. 

So, what empowers us when God says, “How long?” to reply, “NO LONGER!  You are God and no other!  I will follow YOU!”?  Because when the moment of truth arrives and we are faced with a decision on who to follow, whatever has been filling our hearts and minds will drive us in one direction or another.  What is establishing Truth inside you? 

I realized after some pondering that only the Word of God can heal my hobble and if I want to follow Him with a singular and faithful heart I must fill my soul with HIS Opinion and leave room for no other!

This evening as I crawled into bed I felt more than anything, LOVED.  Like a father that sees His child struggling, I felt God loving me in my weakness even as He illuminated the state of my doubting heart. He didn’t turn away. He drew near and I’d almost swear I felt His breath on my cheek as He spoke “Try again, my love, and trust Me.  You really can trust Me.”  

What about you? 

Can you feel the tug of war for your heart, mind and strength? 

Do you ever find yourself limping between two opinions?

What is establishing truth inside you?

Saturate yourself with the Word of God and let it fill you.

Worship  *** You’ve got to hear this song!***

By Judy Villanueva

Then Jacob awoke from his sleep and said, “Surely the LORD is in this place, and I did not know it.” (Genesis 28:16)

“The word present, of course, means near, close to, next to, and the prefix omni gives it universality. God is everywhere here, close to everything, next to everyone.” (AW Tozer, Knowledge of the Holy)

Laying face up in my closet I stared into the blouses that hung above me. This little cubby proves to be a quiet place to pray and always helps me feel tucked away with God.  Do you ever wake up aware of your soul’s longing for God — for an experience of His face, a moment of His love, a Divine touch?  I do, especially when life gets prickly.  To feel His presence infuses all the pieces of my life with hope and meaning.

No matter the trial or richness of any moment, it is the “God with” factor that makes me strong, hopeful, and happy!

As light breaks the night, I wake up with this prayer on my lips, “Find me Father.  Bump into me today.  Help me to live this day with you.”  I admit that what I’m asking for are lightning bolts and holy visions, but instead, God greets me in the morning with whispers and melodies, smiles, coffee and the grace to find Him in the gifts embedded in ordinary days. And, I’m slowly learning  that it all counts!

Rainbows, breezes, sunlight and hugs — puffy white clouds and the taste of buttered toast all count as God’s love reaching out to us.

Cultivating an openness to “count” what we may regard as ordinary blessings becomes a powerful pathway into the Divine presence.

The practice of noticing the day’s blessings is a habit that can form in spite of our reluctance to recognize the Holy within the ordinary.  We are products of a culture that craves special effects, so cooperating with the Holy Spirit as He draws our attention to His gentle movements of love can be challenging.  It requires that we let go of our preconceived notions of Holy encounters and avail ourselves to watching for “God with” us in and through the very life given to us each day.

I stumbled out of bed this morning and moved toward the coffee I smelled brewing down the hallway.  As I took that first warm sip of goodness, I thanked God for taste buds and the new day.  Later, working at my desk, I noticed movement outside my window and there, staring in at me, was a gloriously colored bird arrayed in bright yellow and crimson.  I could not help but stare back at him and offer thanks to God for the beauty He splashed all over this little creature!  Here he is!

That same afternoon I found myself on a couch soaking in the company of a friend, all the while aware that I was in the middle of another good gift.  Do these count as the Divine reaching into my life and offering me love?  “Surely the Lord is in this place”—  the very place where we live each day!  Whether in a closet, on a couch, or stumbling out of bed, God is always with us and wants to be found!

“Father, find me. Bump into me today and help me to live this day with you. Thank you that you love being found!   Help me notice your gentle movements of love today. Amen.”

What about you?

Looking back on your day, are you aware of God’s gentle movements of love?  What were they?

Where do you most easily notice God?

How does the “God with” factor affect you?   He is with you.

God loves to be found!  Ask Him to bump into you today.

Worship

By Judy Villanueva

“Now, this I know:  The Lord gives victory to his anointed.  He answers him from his heavenly sanctuary with the victorious power of his right hand.  Some trust in chariots and some in horses, but we trust in the name of the Lord our God.  They are brought to their knees and fall, but we rise up and stand firm.  Lord give victory to the king! Answer us when we call!” (Psalm 20:6-9)

 I was on a road trip recently and as I stared out the window I could feel the strain of worry pressing in on me.  Abraham seemed to join me in the car and suddenly, I felt his faith reach over and slap me!  It was a good, wake-up kind of slap that pushed me out of an anxious  stupor.  The verse

“Abram believed the LORD, and it was credited it to him as righteousness”

reverberated in my mind and with it, the desire to please and honor God by believing that He is who He says He is.   It reminded me of Pascal’s Wager, wherein he,  a 17^th century French philosopher, threw out the challenge to bet on God.  Paraphrased, he proposed that if you bet on God and He does NOT exist, you lose nothing BUT stand to gain everything if He DOES exist.   Conversely, if you wager that there is no God and in fact there IS, you have bet with your life!  As I pondered what this had to do with me I felt God say,

“Judy, you can keep living as though life is random (and be afraid) OR, you can bet on ME.   I have heard your prayers.  I AM Faithful. Trust Me — take the bet!”

Are you weary of worrying and fatigued by fear?  While subtle, the things that make up our daily lives, good and bad, speak to us about God and little by little shape our image of Him. If we are not careful to renew our minds with the truth of who God is,  our view of  Him will warp.  The temporal and transitory will define what we think of Him rather than His eternal and unchanging Word.

AW Tozer says that “What we think about God is the most important thing about us.”

If we think He is inattentive or uncaring,  how will we trust that He is intimately aware of all our ways?   If we forget that He is Mighty,  how will we ever rest in His arms, especially in times of great trial?  Peace resides in knowing that God always acts with perfect knowledge, victorious power, and faithful love.  Betting on God is all about believing that He is who He says He is!  Another mile passed and I realized that my heart had calmed.  I looked over at Abe with a smile, grateful for his nudge and decided to follow his example.  I took the bet and am trusting that God is and always will be –  faithful.  I pray you will, too!

“Father, I thank you that you are who you say you are, always. I want to honor you by believing that you are faithful, even when I cannot figure out my life. Strengthen and build a believing heart in me. Amen.”

What about you?

What do you need help believing God for today?

What is the basis for your image of God?  Your own understanding?  Circumstances?  The Word of God?

Where have you placed your trust?  By who or what is your heart governed?

Do you, like me, need God to strengthen and build a believing heart in you?

“May the Lord answer you when you are in distress;  May the name of the God of Jacob protect you.  May he send you help from the sanctuary and grant you support from Zion.  May he remember all your sacrifices and accept your burnt offerings.  May he give you the desire of your heart and make all your plans succeed.  May we shout for joy over your victory and lift up our banners in the name of our God.”(Psalm 20:1-5)

Worship

By Judy Villanueva

Make me to know your ways, O Lord;  teach me your paths.  Lead me in your truth and teach me, 
for you are the God of my salvation; 
for you I wait all the day long.  (Psalm 25:4-5)

It was one of those days.  You know the kind where you wake up and, for whatever reason, feel finished before you’ve even started?  All of the undone things that are usually entrusted to God are bubbling up at the surface of awareness.  I never quite understand the ebb and flow of faith.  Why did I feel full of faith yesterday and sorely lacking in it today?  On mornings like these,  I find it helpful to bring my angst to Jesus with a question,  “What is it You want to say to me about this, Lord?” Then I try to pay attention and follow the breadcrumbs back into His arms and to a place of peace.   Do you remember the story of Hansel and Gretel when, as they ventured out into the forest, they dropped a pathway of breadcrumbs so that they might find their way back home again?   Jesus’ voice marks our pathway home and when we ask Him to speak to us about our lives, He faithfully speaks.   We “hear” as we expect Him to speak into our ordinary days, as we pay attention, and as we follow His voice home to His heart.

Breadcrumbs.  An imperfect metaphor, at best, but useful in fashioning a picture of what it looks like to watch for God’s leadings.  What are the spiritual “breadcrumbs” that mark God’s path for us and help us discern His voice?

Believing that God is present in ALL of life helps us notice the holy crumbs that are scattered throughout our days.

God’s voice often comes to us as impressions or highlights.  He sometimes speaks to us through an emphasis, an exclamation point, or a goodness that nestles up and wraps itself around us.  He also urges us through our angst, woes and worries.  We might hear Him as we read the Word, or look out the window, as we sit with a friend or listen to a sermon.  God is speaking and His ways of reaching out to us are endless!  Noticing His voice is the first step toward discernment and moving toward it with curiosity is next!  “What do you want to say to me about this?”

It was near or about the heat of day when I felt a “nudge” to go out for walk.  A breadcrumb.  I grabbed my headphones and went, listening to worship for an hour as I hiked under the shadows of the San Juan Mountains.  So many beautiful songs blessed me and I began to notice a theme emerging.  More breadcrumbs!  I felt drawn to the stanzas that sang of God’s presence and authority over all the earth!  Each song seemed to declare that God is great and faithful, able in all things and trustworthy.  I felt invited to gather the day’s crumbs and taste the Bread that is life!  What would have seemed so ordinary to any onlooker was, for me, extraordinary and soul-filling!  What I heard as I followed the breadcrumbs was a holy whisper that loved me with these words:

“What do I want to say to you today, as you travail and wonder about your future?  I am saying that I am with you!  I will never leave you!  You have Me now and always!  I am on the throne and you, child,  can rest. Now rest.”

“Father,  thank You for Your voice of love.   Teach me the sounds of Your voice and alert me to when and where you are addressing me.  I want to hear what You want to say to me everyday.  I want to follow.  Amen.”

What about you?

What delights you?  What troubles you?

What are you drawn to in any given Bible passage that you’ve read lately?

What has caught your attention in worship, a sermon, devotional reading or in the movie you’ve just viewed?

What does God want to say to you about your life?  Have you asked Him lately?

Will you consider that God is speaking to you all day long and wants you to hear His voice?

Worship:

By Judy Villanueva

So I want you to realize that the Lord your God is God. He is the faithful God. He keeps his covenant for all time to come. He keeps it with those who love him and obey his commandments. He shows them his love. (Deuteronomy 7:9)

I once heard a delightful story of a little boy who is discovered by his mother in a barn shoveling manure.  She sees the sweat on his brow and hears the fullness of his breath as he scoops and throws manure through the air.  When she finally asks what on earth he is doing, he responds, “Where there’s manure, there is sure to be a pony!”  I love this story because it points my face at the beauty of hope!  It also makes me smile because it reminds me of my husband.  He, even in the most dismal of circumstances, keeps on shoveling convinced that a pony awaits his discovery!  I love the hope with which he engages the challenges that face him, even when he’s tired.  It is inspiring to watch a person persevere under trial with hope.  It seems to push them from behind toward their dreams.  As I think more about it, I realize that hope is more than an attitude or feeling.  

It’s a GRACE, a fountain that springs up from the reality of a Hope Giver!  

Hope lives within us, like a friend who prompts us to dream with God and catch the vision He has for our lives.  It is a light that shines in our souls, a song that wants us to remember our Faithful King.  Can you feel it?  Look around and you will see evidence of a majestic Dreamer!  Slow down and awaken to the the song that Hope sings within you.  It’s a melody of promise grounded in our promise-keeping God! There are others songs, as we all know, that intrude with sour notes on our ability to feel hopeful.  Pain and disappointment, loneliness and loss can effectively drown out our “hope songs”. 

But, HOPE LIVES, not in our power to muster a positive thought but in the heart of TRUE LOVE, our faithful God, who cannot be drowned out. 

He is the author, heartbeat and fountain — the WHO, WHAT AND HOW of hope!  So, how do we refresh our hope fountains?

Have you ever studied the names of God?  Each one is a revelation of His face and whenever we point our face at His we are joined to a powerful river of hope!  Deuteronomy 7:9 reveals a name of God only mentioned once or twice in Scripture.  

It is “Ha’El hanne’eman” and it means, “The one true God is faithful.”  

Words cannot capture the magnitude of this divine name but if I were to add a few they would be,  “ALMIGHTY, FAITHFUL, TRUSTWORTHY and TRUE.“  Stop for just a minute, and let the power of His name touch you!  Breath in, “The One True God,” Breath out, “is faithful.” And, God has more names!  His name “El Roi” means “the God who sees me”, “Yahweh shalom” means “the God of peace,”  “Jehovah Jireh” means “God, our provider,” and the  most intimate name of God, “Abba,” means “Daddy Father.”  

Hope stirs in the presence of God and becomes a flow of life inside us, but we must sit now and then, and look at His face.

How are your hopes doing?  Are they alive and  well?  Have they drifted off to sleep?  Have they been crushed or buried?  Then, get out your shovel and with God’s help, dig because there is indeed a treasure waiting to be discovered and His name is Faithful and True! (Rev.19:11) Jesus IS the beauty of hope!  Point your face at His.  Listen to His words.  Follow where He leads you.  Trust Him with all your heart.  REJOICE  because Ha’El hanne’eman is here!

“Father, your name helps me to see you better and in seeing you better I feel hopeful!  Thank you for your faithfulness and love.  Help me to point my face at yours and fill my heart with hope. Amen.”

What about you?

Do you know the Hope-Giver who hopes for you?

How are your hopes doing?  Has life beaten and buried  them?

Do you need your hope fountain refreshed?  I pray the power of Ha’El hanne’eman over your life and ask that God will help you turn your face toward His.

Dig!

Worship

By Judy Villanueva

As Jesus and his disciples were on their way, he came to a village where a woman named Martha opened her home to him. She had a sister called Mary, who sat at the Lord’s feet listening to what he said. But Martha was distracted by all the preparations that had to be made. She came to him and asked, “Lord, don’t you care that my sister has left me to do the by myself? Tell her to help me!”

“Martha, Martha,” the Lord answered, “you are worried and upset about many things, but few things are needed—or indeed only one. Mary has chosen what is better, and it will not be taken away from her.” (Luke 10:38-42)

To sit at the feet of Jesus and let Him be my one distraction sounds both enticing and elusive. More often than not, I find myself in the kitchen with Martha, scowling at Mary and wishing so badly I could be the one sitting at Jesus’ feet.  I like to think that Martha loved Jesus from the kitchen amidst her many distractions and wish I couldn’t relate to how she let them postpone the joy of entering God’s presence.  But, I can.   As I slow down with this passage and take my pulse, I become aware that I am stuck in the kitchen!  I want to be next to Jesus, close enough to see the expression in his eyes and hear the tone of his voice. I know he is in the room with me but am not quite sure how to drop all my doing and find a place at His feet.  Do you ever feel that way?

This moment of awareness becomes a prayer and I ask Jesus to take my soapy hands and lead me out of the kitchen. “Help me, Lord, to turn away from the many things that fill my heart with worry and teach me to want only one thing — only One.”  I suddenly realize that one simple nod from Jesus is all it will take to help me drop my dishes and run to Him. Imagine this moment with me.

Can you see Jesus looking at you in the middle of your day and inviting you to come sit with Him?

Prayerfully, with my Bible on my lap, I imagine the scene and I look at Jesus.  He looks at me!  I see Him seeing me and hold my breath.  THEN, He gives me a smile and a nod and I run to Him!  I realize as I make my way over  that I didn’t think there would be room for me and I wasn’t sure I’d be welcome.  But, looking up at Jesus face I find a big welcome and looking down at His feet, I find a place prepared just for me!

“Jesus, thank you that always see me. I give you permission to nudge me out of my busyness! Thank you that I will always see a “welcome” in your eyes and find a place in your presence prepared just for me. Help me today to bring that same welcome to others. Amen.”

How about you?

Where do you find yourself in this Bible story? Are you in the kitchen, busy with preparations? Or, are you sitting at Jesus feet?

Does the pace of your life leave room for noticing Jesus beckoning you to come to Him?

Do you define yourself by the “many things” or by the “only One”?

What do you need from Jesus today? As you sit at His feet and have His full attention, how can He help you today?

Worship

By Judy Villanueva

And from his fullness we have all received, grace upon grace.  For the law was given through Moses;  grace and truth came through Jesus Christ. (John 1:16-17)

Grace takes its rise far back in the heart of God, in the awful and incomprehensible abyss of His holy being; but the channel through which it flows out to men is Jesus Christ, crucified and risen.(AW Tozer)

Staring down at my plate, I exhaled in defeat.  The pile of peas had won again!  I knew that unless I ate every one of them, I’d be stuck at the dining room table indefinitely.  The sun would go down and I would miss out on all the playtime left in the day.  I hate peas.  I find all other vegetables edible and some, even delicious, but peas make me gag.  Regardless, the rule in our family was to finish everything on our plate or die.  Well, that’s how it felt to a seven year old!  On one occasion, however, my dad sat down next to me and watched as I plugged my nose and attempted to swallow these horrible green little balls.  He gave me the most curious look and finally said, “Judy, if you finish this last pile of peas you will never have to eat another pea in your life.”  I couldn’t believe my ears!  I gave my dad a fierce hug, swallowed the last few bites of peas, and haven’t eaten one since!

This may seem too silly a story to use to talk about grace, something so massively beautiful.  And, I would agree except that I have a sense God’s grace, while grand and glorious, also offers healing through the sweet and small things of life, like when a dad sets his little girl free from the law of sin and peas.  Rules are generally designed to help us live within good boundaries for our physical, emotional, relational and spiritual health.  We count on Biblical statutes, in particular, to guide us toward a lifestyle and choices informed by wisdom and love.  Don’t lie.  Don’t steal.  Be nice.  But, we fail.   We fall short and suddenly find ourselves at the dining room table facing our plate of peas and our inability to keep the rules.  We all need grace, both big and small, from the cross on calvary to the daily graces we give and receive from one another.

Grace is a precious and powerful thing.  Every time we open ourselves to the grace of God we are changed by it. 

And, each time we offer a gift of grace to another, whether through forgiveness, generosity, or a kindness —  a little bit of Heaven spills out of us! 

Its beauty heals.  Grace is always free and undeserved.  The fact that it is “unmerited favor” can be difficult to accept and even more difficult to offer.  We’d rather earn our favor and extend grace only after it has been merited.  This, of course, is not grace at all and points to the fact that grace is conspicuously bigger than we are.  It requires that we turn to its author for the power to give and receive grace—

to the beautiful, generous, gigantic heart of God the Father.  

Here is the dad who sees us in our peaful predicaments and has compassion on us.  Here is our kind and loving Father who sets us free and fills us with grace for others.  He is full of grace.  Grace is who He is!  

“Thank you, Father, for your grace.  I want to be a grace giver and understand that first, I must be a grace receiver.  Open my eyes, Lord. Let grace spill out from heaven and change me.  Amen.”

What about you?

Have you felt the power of grace touch your life?

Have you received the gift of grace offered  to you at the cross?

Is the power and beauty of grace changing you?

Do you like peas?  (Sorry, just had to ask!)

Worship