By Judy Villanueva

I waited patiently for the Lord,
and He turned to me and heard my cry for help.
He brought me up from a desolate pit,
out of the muddy clay,
and set my feet on a rock,
making my steps secure.
He put a new song in my mouth,
a hymn of praise to our God.  (Psalm 40:1-3)

“Are we almost there?  How much longer?”  Car rides to vacation destinations are fun until they become torturously long!  The stretch of highway with nothing around for miles and miles can feel unbearable and seems to capture what it feels like to not know what’s ahead or when we will  reach our destination.  Prolonged periods of waiting can be excruciating.  Worry may hover as we wait for a trial to end, a new job to be offered or a damaged relationship to heal.  It might be a pause that shakes us to the core as we wait for test results or, the sacred limbo that we experience as we wait for a birth or a death.  It seems we’ve been created with a longing for peaceful pastures.  We stretch and strain to get through our lives to the next place of settled peace.   Life can feel “on hold” until the next thing emerges and how we need God’s help to find Him in what feels like “in-between” spaces.

Like the elder son in the story of the prodigal, I approach God with my pleas and grievances when I am feeling desperate and tired or, when life doesn’t seem fair.  He says to me what he said to the elder son, “My son (daughter), you are always with me, and everything I have is yours.”  What?  It almost feels like He’s doesn’t understand until I realize with searing awareness that even after all these years as a child of God, I’m still seeking what the Father might do for me rather than the treasure He always IS to me? Ouch!  In the clarity of the moment I confess that I want the peaceful pasture more than the good Shepherd. Lord, have mercy…

Present trials tend to unravel our peace and pull our vision away from the gift that is always in front of us, God himself.  Sadly, I usually exhaust myself with worry over unsettled places and live waiting for resolution and the next thing to arrive.  I’m slowly  learning to submit to the reality that until it’s the next thing, it’s this thing and that’s ok

Because, until it’s the next thing God is with me and is WHO I need in all my places.  He is my before, after and in-between!

So, it turns out that it is exactly in the space of straining toward the next thing that the ONE thing, the TRUE thing, the ONLY thing — The  FATHER — waits to satisfy the deepest longing of my soul.

And, it is in the waiting and the welcome of present things that I consent to being shaped and helped to want the One who wants me.

God wants to be our green pastures, our place of settled peace, our present and most precious Father, Friend and Lord — all the time and forever.

“Lord, I am so aware of my strong inclination to squirm out of present pain and waiting.  I don’t want to “get through” life — I want to find and feel You with me in all of it.  Amen.”

What about you?

Are you in a time of waiting or  suffering?

Do you find yourself resisting “this present thing” and straining toward the “next thing”?

Do you need help, like me, to trust God with present things?

Jesus is here.  Peace.  God is with you.

Worship