By Judy Villanueva

“Jesus wept.” (John 11:35)

I love that Jesus wept. Initially, I didn’t understand why Jesus wept for Lazarus when He must have known that He could raise Him from the dead!  Even if the Father had said “No” to that plan, Jesus, more than anyone, knew that Lazarus was in a better place. So, why did He weep? I mean, He didn’t just shed a tear and give Mary a hug…Jesus wept!

But, I love that Jesus wept because it tells me that our God is with us. Our – God – is – with – us! Jesus could have skimmed over that moment where death had stolen a dear friend’s life, but He didn’t. Yes, He was omniscient and yes, He was all-powerful!  But, knowing all and being ALL didn’t prevent Him from living that important moment with Mary and Martha in the fullest way.

He did not shy away from suffering a deep sorrow. He didn’t minimize it. He didn’t move ahead of it. He lived it with them and wept.

I love that Jesus wept because it reassures me that I am not alone in my suffering. My Savior, who knows what is working together for good, doesn’t ignore what is at present hurting, nor would He ever dream of having me endure it alone! He stays  with me and because of His amazing love, chooses again and again to weep when I weep.

“Thank you, Jesus, for being with me all the time and in everything. Thank you that I am never alone in my joys or sorrows. Thank you that, even though I forget you regularly, You cannot and would never  forget me. I love that you wept for Lazarus and I love that you laugh and weep with me. Amen.”

What about You?

Do you know that Jesus is with you all the time and in everything?

Is there a place of sorrow where you need to remember that you are not alone?

Whether you are experiencing joy or sorrow, share it with Jesus. He is with you and cares deeply for you.

By Judy Villanueva

I waited patiently for the Lord,
and He turned to me and heard my cry for help.
He brought me up from a desolate pit,
out of the muddy clay,
and set my feet on a rock,
making my steps secure.
He put a new song in my mouth,
a hymn of praise to our God.  (Psalm 40:1-3)

“Are we almost there?  How much longer?”  Car rides to vacation destinations are fun until they become torturously long!  The stretch of highway with nothing around for miles and miles can feel unbearable and seems to capture what it feels like to not know what’s ahead or when we will  reach our destination.  Prolonged periods of waiting can be excruciating.  Worry may hover as we wait for a trial to end, a new job to be offered or a damaged relationship to heal.  It might be a pause that shakes us to the core as we wait for test results or, the sacred limbo that we experience as we wait for a birth or a death.  It seems we’ve been created with a longing for peaceful pastures.  We stretch and strain to get through our lives to the next place of settled peace.   Life can feel “on hold” until the next thing emerges and how we need God’s help to find Him in what feels like “in-between” spaces.

Like the elder son in the story of the prodigal, I approach God with my pleas and grievances when I am feeling desperate and tired or, when life doesn’t seem fair.  He says to me what he said to the elder son, “My son (daughter), you are always with me, and everything I have is yours.”  What?  It almost feels like He’s doesn’t understand until I realize with searing awareness that even after all these years as a child of God, I’m still seeking what the Father might do for me rather than the treasure He always IS to me? Ouch!  In the clarity of the moment I confess that I want the peaceful pasture more than the good Shepherd. Lord, have mercy…

Present trials tend to unravel our peace and pull our vision away from the gift that is always in front of us, God himself.  Sadly, I usually exhaust myself with worry over unsettled places and live waiting for resolution and the next thing to arrive.  I’m slowly  learning to submit to the reality that until it’s the next thing, it’s this thing and that’s ok

Because, until it’s the next thing God is with me and is WHO I need in all my places.  He is my before, after and in-between!

So, it turns out that it is exactly in the space of straining toward the next thing that the ONE thing, the TRUE thing, the ONLY thing — The  FATHER — waits to satisfy the deepest longing of my soul.

And, it is in the waiting and the welcome of present things that I consent to being shaped and helped to want the One who wants me.

God wants to be our green pastures, our place of settled peace, our present and most precious Father, Friend and Lord — all the time and forever.

“Lord, I am so aware of my strong inclination to squirm out of present pain and waiting.  I don’t want to “get through” life — I want to find and feel You with me in all of it.  Amen.”

What about you?

Are you in a time of waiting or  suffering?

Do you find yourself resisting “this present thing” and straining toward the “next thing”?

Do you need help, like me, to trust God with present things?

Jesus is here.  Peace.  God is with you.

Worship

By Judy Villanueva

Genesis 28:15 “Behold, I am with you and will keep you wherever you go…”

Revelation 21:3 “And I heard a loud voice from the throne saying, “Behold, the dwelling place of God is with man. He will dwell with them, and they will be his people, and God himself will be with them as their God.”

What if the plane crashes?  What if the cancer comes back?  What if ____?  Fill in the blank.  The what ifs of life are peace stealers, and as you might guess, their author is Fear.  What ifs depreciate faith and direct our focus onto future unrealities. Then, there are the if onlys!  If only I’d been more patient.  If only I’d stayed home.  If only I’d chosen a different path.  Regret is the author of if onlys.  It beats with condemnation and cultivates sorrow.  If onlys are immobilizing, joy-drainers.  They direct our attention to the past, a time that has ended, a place that is frozen and inaccessible.  If you hear yourself saying, “What if” or “If only,” be alerted that you’ve left the present moment, the very place where the peace of God awaits you.

CS Lewis so poignantly writes in his book, The Screwtape Letters, that “the future inflames hope and fear…and is of all things, the least like eternity…the past is frozen and no longer flows.”  But, he goes on to say,  “The present is the point at which time touches eternity.  The present is all lit up with eternal rays.”  What a thought!  The peace of Emmanuel, God with us, touches our lives in this present moment.

He holds the future and can heal the past, but God’s company, His heart, His voice, and His love joins us right this minute and in every present moment!

I wonder what would happen if we went on the offensive with what ifs and if onlys.  Rather than fearing the unknown, what if we trusted that God remains sovereign over all the events that happen in life?  What if we stayed in this moment, welcomed God’s divine company and rested with Him a while?

What if we brought our fears to Jesus, laid them at His feet, and then —- sat down next to Him?!

Instead of living under the weight of regret, suppose we carried ourselves to the cross and looked up.  Rather than taking another beating, what if we made peace with our mistakes and accepted the things we cannot change.  If only we’d help ourselves remember, especially when we are afraid, that God is always brave for us!  He IS who He says He IS, the great I AM, our dearest Friend right here, right now, and always.

“Thank you, Father, that you are my most faithful friend, that you watch over my life with kindness and that you stay with me every minute of every day.  Help me to stay in the present where I find peace in your arms.  Amen.”

What about you?

Are you troubled by What ifs and If onlys?

Does fear intrude on your present moments with God?

Does regret drain you of joy?

May the peace of Christ, Emmanuel, spread out around you, with renewed hope and joy in His presence.

Worship

By Judy Villanueva

Matthew 11:2-6

When John heard in prison what the Messiah was doing, he sent word by his disciples and said to him, “Are you the one who is to come, or are we to wait for another?” Jesus answered them, “Go and tell John what you hear and see: the blind receive their sight, the lame walk, the lepers are cleansed, the deaf hear, the dead are raised, and the poor have good news brought to them. And blessed is anyone who takes no offense at me.”

John’s was the voice that cried out in the wilderness “Prepare the way of the Lord!” He is in the guy who wore camel hair shirts and ate locusts with wild honey. We definitely get the impression that he was sold out for Jesus, and bold in his message to repent and be baptized! Yet, here in this passage, we find him in prison sending his disciples to Jesus to ask a curious question. “Are You the One, the Messiah or should they wait for another?” It seems to suggest that John was off balance and in need of reassurance. It makes me wonder if he wasn’t scratching his head trying to make sense of the life unfolding around him. Was being in prison part of the plan or did something go wrong? No doubt, his circumstances were not what he had expected!

John the Baptist might seem like a hard guy to relate to, but as I witness him straining toward Jesus in need of strength and direction, I feel an immediate connection! John’s question is my question and was my question this very morning.  I ask it often during times of disappointment or fear, and certainly, whenever I cannot make sense of how the pieces of my life fit together.  You know those times when life is not how we imagined, or when it seems like God is taking forever to answer our prayers?  I’m afraid we might find Jesus’ response to John less than comforting. He doesn’t say, “Hang in there, cousin! I’m on my way to break open the prison doors!” Instead, Jesus tells John that the blind see, the lame walk, the dead are raised and the good news is being preached to the poor. In other words, “Take heart. I am He! I am the One!”

Jesus’ words feel both reassuring and disconcerting because while they announce His reign as Messiah, they do so right alongside John’s plight in prison. This is always the case!

Jesus is Lord and Messiah, always AND right alongside the life that is ours…the life that we may love, as well as the life that may include the hardest trial we’ve ever faced.

It was John’s challenge, as it is ours, to hear Jesus announce His reign and to trust beyond his own understanding. I need to hear Jesus say, “I am the One!” when life has caused my heart to falter…and allow the reality of His reign to strengthen and remind me, that despite present conditions or anything I may not understand, His kingdom has arrived.  It’s already here! That’s what Jesus was telling John.  That’s the good news being preached to the poor and that’s the blessed Truth that sets us free today. Take heart. He is the One! Look no further!

“Lord, help me to hear you announce that You are healing, raising the dead and reigning over all!  Help me to lay down my need to know everything and instead, to bow in faith. Thank you that you are the One! Amen”

What about you?

When do you feel off balance and in need of reassurance?

What does the arrival of God’s kingdom mean to you?

Are you able to rest, knowing that Jesus reigns?

Above and beyond whatever circumstances you find yourself in, God is good and He reigns!

Worship

By Judy Villanueva 

Mark 9:22-24

“But if you can do anything, take pity on us and help us.”  “If you can’?” said Jesus.  “Everything is possible for him who believes.”  Immediately the boy’s father exclaimed, “I do believe; help me overcome my unbelief!” 

“A short-cut!” my husband exclaimed and off he traipsed across the lake-bed.  I was a small distance behind and watched as he blazed a new trail only to end up thigh deep in mud!  Oof!  He was thoroughly stuck and had to lay down flat in order to work his legs free and maneuver his way back to solid ground.  I guess that’s a good picture of my life as it relates to “believing”.  I want to believe and do…until I don’t…and then, I’m just stuck in the mud of unbelief, uncertain where to turn or how to get back on feet of faith. My challenge of belief is not whether God CAN do anything, but rather, lies in the muddy mire of WILL He do what I ask?

The “can” and the “will” of it are two separate matters, I suppose, but when I’m on my knees pleading for pity — I want both!  The CAN of God inspires me to ask with great expectation for anything and everything on my heart but it is the WILL of God that governs His CAN and demands that I exercise faith.

Do I trust His yes or no?  Will I tolerate “what happens next” when it isn’t what I’ve prayed for?

“If you can?” are the words that seem to jump out at me today with care and confrontation.  They seems to look me in the eyes with love and ask if I do, in fact, know with Whom I am speaking when I pray.

When I want what I want, are my prayers lifted to the God who not only CAN but always DOES in perfect harmony with His wise and good purposes?  In the midst of my pain or impatience, can I remember that the One to Whom I pray CAN ONLY be true and faithful?  What then shall I believe?

That I’ll always understand the answers God gives or that He WILL forever ACT with perfection and love…beyond my understanding? 

Jesus words, “If I can?” invite me to stop and look at Him today, to sit at His side and let His voice overshadow my doubts.  When He is next to me and at the heart of all my prayers, I can feel my feet of faith grow wings and my unbelief set free from the mud to watch God do the impossible!

“Jesus, in Your presence I find rest for my soul and faith to believe that everything is possible.  Draw me close to Your heart where I am reminded with Whom I am speaking and given courage to believe that You CAN and WILL be faithful always.  Amen.”

What about you?

Are you mindful when you pray that you are speaking with the God of the universe?  It helps!

What fuels your believing?  Feelings or faith?

What are you believing God for today?

God cannot but WILL and ACT in accord with His perfect knowledge and faithful heart.  You can trust Him and believe that beyond what you can see.

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